‘Just LOVE Yourself?!’ OH Please!
SELF LOVE – WHAT DOES THIS ACTUALLY MEAN? The term ‘self love’ often comes with negative associations of self indulgence…
July 1, 2018
Amongst the many masks we wear to hide our insecurities, the two extremes are those of grandiosity and inferiority. Both often share the same wounding but with very different approaches to hiding the resulting core beliefs of worthlessness and inadequacy.
THE GRANDIOSITY MASK = Also known as ‘I’m better than’. This mask is about playing big. It often shows up through patterns of self-obsession & narcissistic tendencies, with harsh judgements of others and an Inflated ego. It manifests as knowing more, having more, saying more, doing more. Power, status, money and image focused. Favoured by those with loud voices and puffed up chests; strong intellects and a penchant for long words and occasional acts of verbal violence. Underneath the mask is a deep need to be seen and heard, to be validated and loved. To believe that they exist and matter.
The Inferiority mask = Also known as ‘I’m less than. This mask is all about playing small. It often shows up through patterns of never good enough and worthless with high levels of negative self-comparisons and a fragile ego. It manifests as knowing less, having less, saying less, being less. Feeling powerless, a victim, undeserving and without a voice. Favoured by those with collapsed body posture and weak boundaries; often ‘invisible’ with a tendency to use language against themselves as a weapon of mass destruction. Underneath the mask is a deep need to be seen and heard, to be validated and loved. To believe that they exist and matter.
Both of these masks are exhausting to sustain. Both can lead to depression, anxiety, hopelessness and despair. Both hide Truth, and neither are real. Both lead to separation and ‘the forgetting’, a disconnection from the true self, others, nature and ‘God’ (as you understand her to be.)
‘Be very careful…that mask you are wearing, if worn long enough, will one day meld with your face.’ Donna Lancaster, Co-Founder of The Bridge Retreat
The Bridge Retreat – for when you are ready to explore beneath the masks and live authentically.
Are you ready…?
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